Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You took a bar mat shot.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize