So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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