so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize