i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
