It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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