I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
