I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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