I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Randomize
