I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I need to stop coming to work sober
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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