Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
