dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize