Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Randomize
