Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone

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(330): View more from Ohio

She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker

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(619): View more from California

She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?

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(225): View more from Louisiana

is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?

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(512): View more from Texas

I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.

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(813): View more from Florida

Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.

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