8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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