matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
