just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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