Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
