"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
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