i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
