if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Why is there bacon in the couch?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
