Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
