it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Randomize