shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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