fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Apparently you make a good broom.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Are my feet made of real feet?
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
