how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
