Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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