I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
My pussy is not your playground.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize