She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize