If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Randomize
