Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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