It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
