he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
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