So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
