So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
