i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
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