My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Randomize
