and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
