I don't remember. Are we still dating?
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
