I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
NoShamevember. You game?
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
i am craving dick and cupcakes
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