I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
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