You just made me feel so damn special
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
