Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
