He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
