You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Randomize
