Old men and throwing up are my life now.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize