Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize