Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
