You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
