Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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