its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
