can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Randomize