There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize